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My girlfriend’s shy about her breasts

My Girlfriend’s Shy About Her Breasts

I am going out with a girl who loves sex and gives me a good time. But the weird thing is that I cannot touch her breasts. If I try to kiss her nipples or caress her breasts, she gets cold immediately. It’s really weird. Even during love-making she keeps her bra on.

The only time in the last seven months that I saw her bare-chested was in the shower. That was in the early weeks of our relationship, and when I touched her then, she got really annoyed. I can’t see anything wrong with her breasts, just a few stretch marks from when she had her daughter, but those apart, her breasts are lovely. I’ve told her this, but still she doesn’t like me to touch her there. What could be her problem ?

Photo of woman's normal, healthy breasts from infront.

Image of woman’s normal, healthy breasts from infront.

For some reason she has a complex about her breasts. This may be due to something that happened with another lover, or when she was a child. She may have been raised to believe it was wrong to admire that part of a woman’s body – or something like that. She may feel her breasts are too big or too small, too lumpy, or too saggy or pert. Or, she may have been physically hurt in that area.

She may have been brought up to believe that sex shouldn’t be enjoyable, but just allowed for men’s pleasure. Until she feels comfortable enough to open up, it may be best not to press her on this subject. And, when she does open up and wants help to overcome whatever the underlying problem is – be it an abuse situation when she was younger, a weight problem, being teased about them at school, something at home, or anything else – be there for her.

A woman’s breasts are one of the most sensitive erogenous zones on her body and perhaps hers are particularly sensitive. Maybe the degree of pressure with which you touch them tickles her and she doesn’t know how to tell you to hold them more firmly or differently, so she evades the issue.

However, since she already feels self-conscious about them, it would be best to let her come around to talking about them when she’s ready and not make an issue out of them as that could make things worse. Tell her from time to time, gently and caringly, how lovely you find her breasts to be. She may gradually grow to believe you.

By now you might be a bit frustrated at not being able to play with her breasts during lovemaking but, for her sake, try to accept the situation. And remember, the only person who can guide you further on why she feels like this is the lady herself. 

Helen

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Site owner: Author of Sexplained Books - Nurse Specialist in Contraception and Sexual Health, UK

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