I can feel the g-spot being stimulated, but it just feels like I’m going to urinate.

I don’t understand how “amazing” penetration is supposed to feel. I can feel the g-spot being stimulated, but it just feels like I’m going to urinate. I have tried stimulating my clit while being penetrated, but the sensation doesn’t overpower the urge to urinate. Is this a case of me not having a naturally sensitive vagina? I can feel penetration, but for some reason, clitoral stimulation by itself has always been more pleasurable. My partner tells me that the urge to urinate is actually a good thing, but I don’t see how. Can I fix this? – J

Dear J

First of all, do you empty your bladder before you have sex or not?

If not, perhaps it would be a wise precaution to do so.

Second – the G-spot is not a specific anatomical area but as you’ve found, said to be where nerve ends change below the bladder, and some people report that stimulating this area is found to be pleasurable. Plenty of women go their entire life having a happy and satisfying sex life, yet don’t recognise this area, as such – so don’t stress about the ‘G-Spot’ or not.

Third – clitoral stimulation is very commonly more pleasurable for women, than penetration as a way to reach orgasm, either on their own during masturbation or with their partner rubbing themselves against it in some way during intercourse.

Just relax. Enjoy your time together and try not to analyse what’s happening so much.

If you continue to analyse it, you risk reducing any spontaneous enjoyment.

And, I hope you are using condoms with plenty of lubricant, to keep things safe. 

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